Once a Mom, Always a Mom

Intern Chronicles Cropped

Getting yelled at on the sidewalk has motivated me to put myself in the shoes of the yellers and really meditate on the circumstances and emotions they are feeling. This is what I have realized:


I have heard that losing your child causes one of the worst pains one can endure. Once someone is a mom, that person will always be a mom- whether her baby lives or dies. From conception a spiritual bond happens, so as a natural result, when separation occurs between the mom and child, pain happens. One cannot conclusively say that pro-choice, post abortive woman are hurting any less than any other woman who may have lost her child to cancer, accidents, miscarriage, etc. It just manifests itself in different ways. This explains the great wrath they show toward those who are pro-life. When someone disrupts their fragile inner paradigm, they feel an inner conviction that is too much for them to process. In order to re-establish that paradigm, they become defensive. This can also explain the hostility of woman who only take birth control, but who have not had a traditional abortion. Often, birth control can serve as an abortifacient if it stops the fertilized egg from implanting in the uterus. Life happens at conception, thus the same spiritual shifts that happen when a woman has and loses a child happens to her as well.


I have lost 2 family members this year, and if somebody tried to blame me for their death, I would be very angry. I know it wouldn’t be true, but that would not change the initial reaction I would have. Now imagine if somebody was accused of killing a family member on purpose. 


Society has justified abortion, but the truth is always strongest. When confronted with the truth, it shocks them. This is not because they are finding out something new but because they are coming into contact with something they knew deep down all along. God has built our souls with a conscience, but unfortunately our society does not do a good job of forming our intellect to be in union with the conscience God gave us. God has built mothers with a deep intuition to nurture. Post-abortive women will commonly interpret pro-life rhetoric as an indirect accusation of them going against their deep intuition to nurture. Even though most of the pro-lifers I know are just focused on wanting to protect the unborn, abortion minded woman and post-abortive women mostly only perceive condemnation. The mere presence of pro-life work threatens their inner world because their inner world is an unstable one built on lies from our society. 


As you can see, A LOT is happening in a woman’s inner world when she is disturbed by pro-life activity. Dehumanization of the preborn has been strategic. It has not started with the dehumanization of the preborn, but of the mother. Birth control has set the foundation for lies- one of which is that we can have sex without consequences. Sex without long term effects was never a part of God’s plan. When we try to act like it is possible, it only leads to unhappiness. Trivializing the preborn happens when we trivialize the process used to make them. Trivializing the process used to make the preborn becomes easier when we trivialize the inherent dignity of the people involved in the process. Society has trivialized women’s inherent dignity, the way they have trivialized the preborn. If a woman’s dignity has been constantly trivialized, how can she suddenly find the invaluable empowerment to raise a child? It seems nearly impossible, but it is not. We can encourage her with options, words of truth about her value, and by being a living example ourselves- because how can we expect others to know their inherent dignity if we do not recognize it within ourselves?

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